Marriage and the Parsha

Vayechey

Genesis 47:28-50:26)

Rabbi Y. Benyowitz

(For the Groom or Bride)

Our weekly portion begins with the details of Yaakov Avinu’s (Jacob) last days. He blesses each of his sons before he dies and attempts to forewarn his children of the trials and tribulations that they and their descendants will encounter.

There is one very unusual aspect to the beginning of the parsha that differentiates it from other portions. Our parsha begins with no break (a visual pause in the torah scroll) separating it from the previous parsha. Generally, in a hand written scroll of the Torah there is either a break at the end of a parsha of at least nine letters length of space or the entire remainder of the line is left intentionally blank. This is indicated in many Chumashim by the letter Peh or the letter Samech (in some printed Chumashim, this break is indicated by three Pehs or three Samechs in a row) placed after the last period in the parsha. This is the only exception.

Rashi tells us that our parsha is closed indicating that the eyes and hearts of Israel became closed and unable to understand what awaits them in the days of Messiah from the hardship of the exile that they had begun to force them into slavery. This is understood to mean that it was as if Yaakov Avinu had died already and his death singles the beginning of the exile's harshness.

Many of the commentaries comment that the actual labor of the Egyptian exile did not begin until the death of all of the brothers.

The Chasam Sofer (Rabbi Moshe Sofer) explains that there are two ways to view the Torah. One can think of Torah in the sense of a yoke and a burden and one can view Torah as the ultimate in joy for the opportunity to fulfill Hashem's commandments. The Mitzvot are the conduit through which one may gain a closer relationship with the Al-mighty.

When one sees the Torah as a burden, then the person feels enslaved by the Torah. When Yaakov Avinu died the Jews no longer felt as close to Hashem and as such they began to feel as if their responsibilities as Jews were enslaving them. This was even before the Torah and all of its six hundred and thirteen Mitzvot were given to them. When their father (and grandfather) was still with them, the Jewish People did not have this feeling. In this sense, the Galut started when Yaakov Avinu died even though they did not begin physical servitude until much later.

Every Simcha is enhanced by the participation of parents. Still, it is at this juncture that we must take stock and publicly thank our parents and acknowledge that their contribution to our Simcha is priceless. It is in their shadow that our marriage can get off to the start that it needs and not appear has a burden. It is our prayer that they should continue to reap much nachas from us and all of our siblings.

Copyright 2001 Rabbi Yirmiyahu Benyowitz and MyJewishWedding.com